self esteem issues

I watched the stars, thinking of you
I kissed him, as if he were you
All the little flickering lights in the sky
Frowned upon me, suddenly,
and the beauty of the night was through...

Poisonous words he has, poisonous lips
A perfect picture of everything I despise
Is beauty alone capable of invoking such weakness
Or am I still just a fool,
                                          slave to ancient instincts?

What has to be done, has to be done!
I have to pick up the scattered pieces
of my broken pride, one by one,
Put them all together, swear an oath,
And finally seal it all with my blood.
Let this be the last promise I broke,
This story survived more than it is worth
Let this be the last verse about it I write...